Things my Students Say...

Hi y'all!


This week I have been quite lame...so my sincerest apologies. Aside from playing badminton (be glad there's no pictures from that) I have been decidedly uncool. Also I have 0 hand-eye coordination- so I don't think badminton is a sport for me.
But I did go see Hunger Games this weekend. And that was AWESOME! Go see it y'all!


But the level of sass in the movie made me think of another group that has been particularly sassy this week...my students.
Now I love my students, and they are brilliant. But sometimes they say things and I have to stop myself from laughing. Sometimes it's cultural misunderstandings- but more often, it's just that I teach students who range from age 4 to age 10.


So this week I present...things my students say:


Preschool:

• Me: Boys and girls, today we have a special visitor!
  
• Student: Is it Santa? Is Santa here? (Proceeds to jump up and down)
  
• Me: No, it's someone here to talk to us about grandma and grandpa.
  
• Student: Not Santa? (Face crumples)
  
  

• Me: (During Christmas Rehearsal) I can't hear you singing!
  
• Student (in Chinese) Teacher, maybe you don't understand Chinese because you can't hear.
  
  

• Me: Today we have spots! Who is wearing spots?
  
• Student: Teacher Lauren you! (points to my freckles)
  
  

• Me: How are you today?
  
• Student: I'm Crazy!
  
  
• (In the middle of story time, in Chinese) Teacher, ------- didn't eat his breakfast. He shouldn't get a smiley face today.   *My students eat breakfast at home. I have no control over this. 

• Me: Let's pray.
• All Students: Thank you God for snack time. Amen.
• Student 1: No!  No! No!  Thank you god for lunchtime.  We do not do our best!

1^st Grade:

• (I walk into class) Student: Teacher horse!!! Teacher horse! (I shouldn't have told them my Chinese name is 馬若蘭。
  
  

• Student: Teacher, what are pom poms?
  
• Me: You wave them in the air when you dance
  
• Student: Is it cake? Chocolate?
  
  

• Student: Teacher Lauren will you check my homework?
  
• Me: Sure!
  
• Student hands me Chinese workbook.
  
  

5^th Grade:
This week I asked my students:
“What is your favourite thing about this class?” Their answers:

• When Teacher gives us food so she doesn't get fat
  
• When Teacher talks funny (I believe this is when my southern accent comes out)
  
• When Teacher pretends she's stupid so we have to help her

“What is your least favourite thing about this class?”:

• Teacher can't have the air conditioning on because the doctor said so (this is true)
• When Teacher understands Chinese and gives us strikes for saying bad things
• The water drips in the bathroom

• Student: (imitating me) Y'all, we ain't got time for this mess.  (Note: My students are not going to be prepared for life outside of the South at this rate.)

• Student: (talking about hobbies) Teacher Lauren, do you bake cookies with your boyfriend?
• Me: No
• Student: Do you have a boyfriend?
• Me: No
• Other Student: (Nods knowingly) Did he get three strikes so you break up?

On that note...

Next weekend I am off to HONG KONG!!! Happy American Thanksgiving to me! So I promise next week I will have some great photos, stories, and philosophical musings. I apologize my blog is neither academic nor transformational...but hopefully something this week made you smile!

Why it's more fun to be a teacher than a student

What are you doing this weekend?  That was the question I asked my 5th graders this week.  We're learning the present continuous (aka I am doing, he is going, etc.)

You see life as a preschooler is pretty awesome in Taiwan.  You get to go on field trips to see things like this:

"What are these?  What sound do they make? Why are you trying to grab Teacher Lauren's camera?"
- Questions I ask my preschool students on field trips

But the older you get, life gets significantly less fun.  As evidenced by my 5th graders' writing:

On Friday, I am studying for my test.

On Saturday, I am studying for my test.

On Sunday, I am studying for my test.

I am not having fun this weekend because my test is very important. 

Am I striking fear into the hearts of 5th graders everywhere?  Of course not.  These are my students' normal school midterms they are studying day and night for, not my test.  Now clearly some of my students in Mississippi could have learned a lot from my fifth graders in Taichung about work ethic.  But at the same time, it seems that being a student, from elementary school to high school, is more stressful than anything else in this country.  They are always studying, and there is so much pressure to achieve- from parents and from themselves.  It seems that my fifth graders in Taichung could also learn something from my Mississippi students- how to enjoy being a kid.  

So I am trying to enjoy my life a lot more…because I am hoping that I can convince my students to have MORE fun!!!  So far this includes dance parties and candy, plus games and contests.  And having lots of fun myself!   Because if I don't know how to relax and have fun, I can hardly encourage my students to do the same.  I've failed at this before, but I think I'm currently pretty successful.  For proof, some things I did this weekend:

Fun fact: You can make dulce de leche in Taiwan.  Put a jar of condensed milk in a crockpot full of water for 9 hours.  Enjoy with cookies, crackers, apples, guava, or just a spoon.  Reminiscing about Paraguay is strongly encouraged. 

We went to bible study…and there was a light show at a temple across the street!!! 

Hiking!!  Do I enjoy hiking? NO.  But do I enjoy face paint? Yes.  Time with friends? Yes.  The realization that I can climb approximately a gazillion stairs even though I might feel like I'm going to die? Definitely.

And a week late, a Halloween party! (I'm little red riding hood!) And thank you Pinterest…so many awesome spooky food ideas!

So what's next to convince myself and my students that life can be fun?  

Can you read Chinese???  If so this should be easy!  If not, let me give you a hint: 3/15 Hualien East Coast Half Marathon here I come!

Happy Halloween!!

We have been celebrating Halloween in grand style here in Taichung!  It's been a little bit of a rough week- I managed to get sick the day I was subbing and therefore working extra hours.  Oops!  Luckily it's nothing ginger and honey haven't been able to fix.  And of course, candy.

In my preschool classroom, we have been busy making all sorts of things to celebrate.  We learned what pumpkins are and how to make jack-o-lanterns!  My students loved getting to cut out some smiley faces and "hair" for their pumpkins!

We're so cute other classes came to take pictures with us!!!

The next day, it was time to use our real pumpkins!  I had requested canned pumpkin from my school to make pumpkin smoothies with my students.  Of course, canned pumpkin, it turns out, does not exist in Taiwan.  Instead, we got a small pumpkin.  I will say, cutting and boiling the pumpkin was much easier than I expected, and the kids loved getting to practice counting their seeds!  Also, Pumpkin Smoothies are so delicious and easy to make (ok, less easy without canned pumpkin) it was a great day!

No pictures from our messy adventure, but this is what the finished product looks like!

I seem to have become Martha Stewart over the past week, because I insisted that we keep the pumpkin seeds so I could roast them.  And used the pulp to make a face mask.   I don't know what's up with me.  It's a little scary.  I also did this thing where I did laundry and grocery shopping before noon on a Saturday.  Really, I think I'm becoming a grown up.

Just my pumpkin seeds hanging out in my classroom…where my fifth graders would be extremely confused about what they were

Thursday, actual Halloween was finally here.  We lit our jack-o-lanterns (made with my fantastic co-teacher Vicky) and donned our "costumes".  My students were cats and supermen/women, complete with masks or ears.  We went trick-or-treating to our sister class, the Deer class.  It was adorable to watch the children exchange treats.  We later went to sing our trick or treat song for some of the other classes, and were blessed with even more candy!  We also had some other students from the Lion class who trick or treated with scary face make up- we were excited to see someone else in "costume".  It was a great way to share the holiday with my students!  

My 1st and 5th graders) didn't get quite as much fun, but I did make some chocolate bananas for them and show them the jack-o-lanterns!)

As for my Halloween celebration, I got to go see Thor this weekend with some friends, which was AMAZING.  Go see it when it comes out in America and Canada!!!  I won't spoil anything, but prepare yourself for some big shocks!  And stay after the credits!

The perks of living abroad…seeing the movie before it's out in the US!!!